shhh... it's a secret

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

RST: Alfalfa, Oatmeal, Food Poisoning, New Job, and Things I Miss

            

        
It's Tuesday, which means, time again for another Random Shit Tuesday


My randomness...

I hate giving this man anymore attention than he deserves, however maybe it's just me, but doesn't it look like Charlie has the same barber as Alfalfa? I can't help but think that every time I see him in a pic with this unfortunate center part (that and, "Man, what a dork."). 

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I have yet to master the perfect bowl of oatmeal. It's either too dry and ends up like paste, or it's too watery. One of these days, though. One of these days. I'm determined.

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Every time I'm cooking or cleaning in the kitchen, I pretend that I'm in a Goofy How To short circa the 1940s, and I imagine what the narrator would be saying about me. In my case it would be called How To Catch Salmonella in Your Kitchen. The narrator would say shit like, "Notice how OBG  dries her mixing bowl with the same towel she just used to wipe up that spilled egg. Ah yes, her chances of food poisoning are great now."


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The G-Man starts a new job in about a week and a half. I know what you're thinking, "Wait, didn't he just get a new job?" Yeah, he did, but that was, like, six months ago, so, you know, it's about time to move on. Actually, as it turns out, there were some sketchy things going on at that new job that the G-Man had been misled/lied to about when he was hired, and it was decided that it would be in his (our) best interest to move on. Don't worry though, it only took him about a month and a half to secure a new job this time, and he only turned done a few outrageously shocking job offers. The G-Man's luck blows my mind. If you can call it luck. I mean, who becomes a Senior Systems Engineer with only a Bachelor's degree in psychology (from a state school, no less!)? The G-Man, that's who. Really though, this new job is a good thing, no matter how much of a hard time I give him about it.

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I miss raw sushi and regular cups of coffee and whiskey and wearing my favorite clothes and not gagging on red meat and sleeping on my stomach and eating popcorn for dinner and having an itch-free belly and...

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And that's all she wrote, folks.

5 comments:

erin said...

I had no idea you were pregnant! Where the heck have I been?

Well super duper congrats!

I couldn't give up coffee with my last two pregnancies. I felt like a jerk. I cut it down to two cups a day though.

I missed sushi a lot though, but was fairly contented with daikon vegetable rolls. Those are my fave.

MeredithDuck said...

Those Goofy cartoons were always my favorite. I would probably have the same narration. My husband says that he is amazed that I haven't killed us yet by how I work in the kitchen. I'm not disgusting, but apparently according to him I'm not very thorough in my cleaning. Not that he's offering to help...

Hope said...

Congrats to the G-Man on his new job! He must be very good at what he does. :D

April said...

@ Erin- No worries. Just announced it to the world a week or two ago. I'm averaging about 2-3 cups a week, which I think is pretty damn good.
@Meredith- Mine too. I miss the classics. And I'm positive I have a constant low-grade case of food poisoning all the time. My lack of cleanliness in the kitchen in deplorable.
@ Hope- Yeah, he is. Which is a very good thing. I'm very proud of him.

kimberly montoya said...

ah yes the great oatmeal dillema.... you know what i found was fun, letting the oats soak over night. (assuming you are using real old fashioned oats). you put them in the measured amount of water, mix them up, leave over night. then the oats have the best texture in the morning. you can heat them up and add your stuff right before you eat them. or put in fridge and eat them cold (when it is hot out).... supposedly soaking the oats makes them easier to digest too. try it, its yummy. plus if you put raisins in, they soak up the water during the night and plump up, mmmmmm.

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