shhh... it's a secret

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

I've-Got-Some-Words-For-You, Wednesday

When will companies realize that I don't want some dude in India listening to my ranting and raving when I have a billing issue? English isn't his native language, therefore he won't be able to fully understand the severity of my problem. Will he really be able to grasp the nuance of using the word "fabulous" when thoroughly dissatisfied? No, he'll just keep repeating the same phrase over and over to me until I crack and start yelling, sweating and crying all at once. And then he'll put me on hold for two minutes and after two minutes he'll repeat what he had previously said and then put me on hold for two minutes again and then finally, 20 minutes later, he'll "talk to his supervisor". And then I'll feel super guilty after he fixes my issue, so I'll apologize and thank him for his help that wasn't so helpful. Like I need more guilt in my life.
I live in the same house as you. I told you, to your face, that yeah, I'll go camping this weekend. We went to the store and purchased some camping equipment together. We discussed driving arrangements and who may or may not be accompanying us on said camping trip. After all this, why the fuck should I be expected to RSVP to your Facebook camping "event"? I already told you I'm going, why does the rest of the world need to know my weekend plans? They don't. So... back the fuck off!

I don't even know what CrossLoop is.
Is it really absolutely necessary that I create an account for everything I want to do on the internet? Why? Why, why, why? Want to find a job? Create an account first. Want to research car insurance? Create an account first. Want to listen to free music? Create an account first. Free movies and TV? Create an account first. Want to view the pizza menu online? You have an account, right? And why must every single freakin' account be linked to an email address? I find I'm creating new email addresses all the time because the old ones are getting so bogged down by junk mail. I have email accounts, banking accounts, blogging accounts, insurance accounts, teaching accounts, job searching accounts, shopping accounts, post office accounts, DMV accounts, credit card accounts, music accounts, entertainment accounts... WHEN DOES IT END, I ASK YOU, WHEN?!?

Is it really necessary for the workers at those damn kiosks in the middle of the mall to approach me every time I walk by? I just walked by here, foreign blonde chickie, and I still don't want to try the hair product you're swindling. Just let me get on with my window shopping in peace, please. And the same goes for all you charity drives. Putting cute little kids at a table outside of a store and making them ask passerbys (aka me) if they (me) want to buy their product, for charity, isn't going to make them (me) want to buy it. For one, I never have cash on me. And for another, ugh, let me be. The same applies to cashiers who try to get me to buy their ribbons/balloons/smile faces for only $1 when I'm checking out. Yes, sometimes I'll feel generous and purchase your lousy piece of paper, for charity, but I'm not going to do every single time I'm in the store. I DON'T NEED ANYMORE GUILT IN MY LIFE!

Thanks for letting me get all of that off of my chest. No, I'm not PMS-ing, why do you ask? And in regards to that job interview that I had? Eh. We'll see, but I'm not really feeling it. As always, I nailed the interview, but that doesn't mean I got the job. Sometimes that's just the way the cookie crumbles.


alamodestuff said...

Oh my! Those are pet peeves that resonate with me! The FB (and Evite) online response for events is a big one!

LOL, I should to do a "get this off my chest" post. Seems cathartic!

Cathy said...

OMG YES! I love this. Seriously, what is the deal with creating accounts for everthing?? I can't keep track of all the accounts I have. It's madness, I tell you, madness.

Sara Louise said...

I'm living vicariously through this post. All these things get on my wick.

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