shhh... it's a secret

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Sunday Confessions: #1-3


Sunday. The day of rest. Many people spend this day being "productive", doing things like attending church, working around the house, grocery shopping, or gardening.


Well, I can't be bothered with those time wasters as I'm too busy doing other extremely important things. Like sleeping in or recovering from a hangover or watching TV in my pajamas or drinking coffee or boozing it up or fornicating, among many other various good-for-the-soul activities. I admit, being as productive as I am on a Sunday may not seem very restful to the outside observer, however, I assure you, my mind, body and soul finds these sorts of strenuous activities very restful.

In an attempt to further convince you that I take this day of rest very seriously, I have decided to take the Sunday thing one step further. To the confession booth. Despite my lack of religious proclivity, I believe confession is good for us all.

So without further ado, please come forward and step into my confessional booth where all our dirty little secrets can be shared.


 Sunday Confessions:

#1- Sometimes, if we're out of toilet paper, I'll pee while in the shower. Shhh...

#2- I can't stand the use of "LOL". I don't use it, I don't think I have ever used it, and I don't intend on ever using it. In fact, I'm seriously considering un-friending the people who do use it just because I can not stand reading it at the end of every sentence, status update and comment these people type.

#3- One of these days my dirty mind is going to get me into trouble when I take attendance in some of my art classes. Seriously. It has a tendency to turn some names into, uh, well, inappropriate words. For example...
Laiba- My brain turns this into Labia (real pronunciation, Li-ba)
Faiq- My brain turns this into Fawk which isn't a far cry from Fuck (real pronunciation, Fike)
Valeria- My brain turns this into Venereal not, as you might expect, Malaria (real pronunciation, Va-lair-ia)


jules said...

Your idea of a perfect Sunday is right up my alley, lol.

(JUST KIDDING ABOUT THE LOL PART!!!) I freaking hate it when people have to end everything with that too. If I simply must use something to express laughter, I will type ha ha.

Seriously, hope you are enjoying your booze, caffeine and fornicating today!

International Woman of Mystery said...

I have never liked the use of LOL either! I can't stand when people (esp. men) use it. I prefer "ha ha."

Sara Louise said...

Hate lol. Hate it.

Related Posts with Thumbnails