shhh... it's a secret

Friday, June 4, 2010

TGI... FU

         
For your consideration, the highlights, and, more likely, the lowlights of my week...
  • I came back from my sister's to an empty house. Yay! Well, not exactly empty. Wacko Art Girl hasn't moved out yet and Banker Girl lives here permanently and Landlord Dude technically still lives here, but basically lives at his girlfriend's place (for those of you who don't know, I currently live in a house that houses college students. About 6-7 people live here). I love it when the house is nearly empty. It means I can drink my beer in peace, leave my dirty dishes on the counter overnight and shower whenever I get around to it.
  • I discovered that nuking peanut butter in the microwave for 30 seconds and topping it with frozen vanilla yogurt is the best treat ever. It's super-d-duper better when using crunchy peanut butter.
  • I applied for a job as an assistant for a woman who claimed, "I will get back to you in a flash!" I don't really expect to get the job, but I liked the idea that she would immediately let me know that I wasn't right for the job. Apparently her definition of "in a flash" and mine are different because I haven't heard back from her yet. I can't stand it when I apply for a job and then I'm left hanging in limbo. Remember that job interview I went on ages ago? Yeah, well the Principal told me he would be letting all the candidates know one way or the other within a day. Yeah, well I'm still waiting for that phone call. Or rejection letter. Or at least a rejection email. (I know, I know. I could have called them, but I'm stubborn, dammit, and when someone says they're going to do something, I expect them to do it.)
  • I discovered that my thighs have recently decided that they must give each other an encouraging pat every time they cross each other mid-stride. Not cool, thighs, not cool.
  • Some random dude hit on me while sitting at a traffic light, which made me feel really good, especially since I hadn't showered that day and I had a seriously painful zit working it's way to the surface of my face. Then I looked down and realized I was having a total Paris Hilton/Fire Crotch moment as a result of my insistence on driving with my left leg propped up on the lower part of my car door, and my hatred for shorts, which was why I was wearing the same jean skirt for three days in a row. Which then reminded me of the thigh-rubbing thing, which totally bummed me out again.
  • I impulsively went to the grocery store to buy fruity Twizzlers after visiting the Etsy store of new follower, charasjewelcandy. Thighs be damned! On a side note, did you know that a serving of fruity Twizzlers is 3 Twizzlers? Yeah, apparently it is, which I think is wrong. I mean, there are 6 colors! How do you decide which three colors to eat? Moving on... I also picked up toilet paper (cause we all now my track record with that), microwave popcorn (because my brain could use the food) and...
  •  Meet (name to be determined). This little guy is going to save my life. I decided that I need some sort of purpose or else I'm going to lose this battle I'm currently fighting. My new purpose in life is to keep this guy alive. Now, those of you in-the-know know that my track record with plants is not good. In fact, I've killed every plant I've ever owned (except for the ones that my family have removed from my custody). You might be thinking that I'm just setting myself up for EPIC FAILURE, and you're probably right, but like I said before, I'm stubborn. And I need a project. Plus, I'm pretty sure this guy will be easy to care for.
  • A new housemate moved in. He's interning in NY for the summer and hails all the way from Temple, TX. And that's about all I know about him. Oh, and his sisters recently got him hooked on LOST so he's been holed up in his room for marathon LOST watching. Oh, and he makes a full pot of coffee every morning before he goes to work, which is awesome, because I love coffee, but I love coffee I don't have to make even more.
  • I'm currently suffering from insomnia. Which sucks and means that I'm going to bed around 4am and waking up at 8am but not getting out of bed until 10am. It also means that when the automated sub system calls with an assignment at 5am, my tired and fried-out brain automatically ignores the call. I'm also totally regretting scheduling an eye appointment for 10am. Life hates me.
  • Landlord Dude informed me the other night that he has already rented my room out for the summer. So... looks like it's official. I'll be homeless at the end of the month. 
  • Banker Girl invited me to go with her to Mountain Jam this weekend. She volunteers and gets all sorts of freebies and what not. Unfortunately, I already have lame-o plans for Saturday, so I had to decline the invite. Bummer, Dude.
  • Remember my toe injury? (Don't worry, Erin, no toe pics in this post.) Well, I totally lost the fight to keep the skin flap. Just in case you were wondering.
    • You ever see those bloggers who have those really neat signatures at the end of their posts? Yeah, well, I tried to make my own using my laptop. This is the result:
    • Nice, right? Just call me Anlnme. Yup. That's me! Anlnme (pronounced anal-n-me, in case you were wondering). I think I just found my new name. Yay!

    Anywhoops... hope you all have a fabulously wonderful weekend. I'll be drinking wine. Quite possibly with new glasses (as in, eyeglasses). See you on Monday! (or sooner if I get bored)

    5 comments:

    Writing Womb said...

    hmm being homeless and jobless sucks ass, but maybe you too could make a sign that says ' will work for comments' and that will help?

    I don't know, I am too brain dead to think of anything better than that, sorry for wasting you precious comments space...this post made me laugh lots
    oh, i too have a problem keep green things alive, instead of having a 'green thumb' i always say i have a black thumb as in the thumb of death cause everything that i touchg seems to die ;o) oh happy day!

    Mei said...

    I think that the easiest way to keep a bamboo alive is keep it in the bathroom. That way it still gets steam when you forget to water it.

    LMA said...

    The ONLY plant I have yet to kill is my bamboo one. It's been alive in my office for five years. I've done nothing at all to it but poor it slap full of water once a week - sometimes every other week.

    That's it. It's tall as hell and probably should be repotted but I don't do that.

    Midwestern Mama Holly said...

    Im sorry to laugh at your misery, but you tell it in such a funny way. Can landlord dude actually give you that little of time to get out? Arent there laws or something?

    One Blonde Girl said...

    @ Womb- I will take that into consideration. Maybe Mr. Bum will let me sit on his corner with him and we can both offer to "work for" things. Wait a minute. That doesn't sound like such a good idea anymore. Who knows what kind of comments I'd get on a street corner.

    @ Mei- You are a genius. How have we not crossed paths before?

    @ LMA- You have no idea how encouraging it is to hear that. I gotta be honest, I'm a little concerned about my ability to care for other living things, but you have given me hope!

    @ MMH- Laugh away! Someone's got to have a sense of humor about this. And in regards to the landlord, I pay month to month, and since I have yet to find a job to acquire the $ for another month's rent... I think he can pretty much boot me.

    Related Posts with Thumbnails