Last night (late last night, I might add, yay!) I was watching Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (again), which, of course, got me thinking and prompted me to pose this question on Facebook:
"If you could permanently erase someone from your memory, would you?"
I was totally unprepared for the debate that followed. Before I share with you the Facebook convo, let me explain where I was coming from with this question.
I very rarely regret anything in my life. In fact, I tend to regret the things I didn't do over the things that I did do. I truly believe that all the bad decisions and shit storms that have occurred in my life have made me who I am today. And, for the most part, I am happy with that.
On the other hand, there are moments when I have a hard time getting over the good things and good people in my life that are no longer present. And yes, while it could be argued that they have also made me who I am, sometimes the good memories are just too painful to keep re-living. So yes, sometimes, I wonder if I wouldn't be better off not remembering what once was.
And now onto the Facebook convo, because I'm sure you're all just dying to read it:
OBG If you could permanently erase someone from your memory, would you?
Barcelona Eternal Sunshine style? Hard to say. I've certainly considered it though! Ugh.
SMos No, however the reason we begin to forget or things become less clear over time is a human defense mechanism (Radiolab, 2009)
Barcelona A g r e e d .
OBG @ Barcelona- Yes, E.S. style. I'm more inclined to erase the good memories, not the bad ones
@ SMos- Huh. And when exactly does that start kicking in?
SMos hopefully soon ;)
Btw I ♥ the little boy's facial expression in your profile pic on the left
Minced Fish It seems to me that forgetting people is a pretty shitty defense mechanism. I wouldn't want to forget what I have learned from the people I would have been better off not knowing.
Conch Shell HELLA yes, with a capital hella.
OBG @ SMos- That's Ben. He and I are best buds.
@ Minced Fish- Good point. You are wise (good lord, don't tell anyone I said that).
OBG @ Conch Shell- :)
Twin No. I change my mind.
Mama A Defense mechanism? And here I thought it was just aging....
Hoopster Nah-everyone (even those who suck) turns you into who you are. Everything is a lesson learned. I look at it that way.
Foxy Lady YUP...
Capitol OH yeah...... I wish I could permanently erase 2 or so years!!!
BC I don't think so. No matter how much you may dislike someone, if it wasnt for them you wouldnt be who you are today. Pretty corny right?
Capitol Yeah really corny and I think there is some truth to that but you are who you are.... and I dont think that every person that comes into your life changes it.... I see hundreds of people everyday but I dont think they change my life at all.....
BC The fact that you just brought them up in conversation means that they have changed your life. Even people I have never met and have only seen in passing have changed my life. I like myself (for the most part) and I thank everyone for that, even that kid I got in a fight with in junior high school.
Capitol WOW.... thats really deep.... I'm still not sold... you watch too much Lifetime TV.... but thats cool.... I get it.... I guess
BC Well as long as you get it... I guess your life changed a little.
Beautiful Girl i'm so with you BC... you are who you are beacause of the experiances you've had... good, bad, and ugly!
Care to weigh in? What are your thoughts on the subject? Are there things, people or memories in your life you think you would be better off forgetting? Comment away!